Equilibrium: MM Gay Shifter Romance (Kingdom of Night Book 3) Read online

  "I'm fine, really," I said, withering under Ulric's stern gaze. "Fine," I murmured, letting him help me into the chair beside Arthur's bed.

  "You know, as your defacto doctor, I'm going to have to prescribe you a helmet," Clara said dryly, flashing the light in my eyes. It burned, but it wasn't as bad as sunlight.

  "Probably a good idea," I agreed, cringing when she brought out the stitches. "Is that really necessary? I've had enough for one day."

  She gave me a strange look. "Well, I suppose you'll heal well enough, but you need to drink. Real blood, not bagged."

  Sebastian glanced at Arthur. "What about his? He could earn his keep."

  "No," said Victor before I could protest. "Prentice's blood is in his veins. If he drinks hunter's blood, he could die, even if it is diluted."

  "Oh, right," muttered Sebastian, rubbing the back of his head. "Don't listen to me."

  "We rarely do, dear," Clara said, starting to put away her kit.

  "There's always Maverick," said Victor.

  "No, no," I said quickly. "Steven's funeral is tomorrow, I can't ask him to do that. Please, Clara, just give me the stitches, it's fine."

  She shrugged and started her prep over. The local anesthetic didn't help much, but it wasn't anything compared to the bizarrely realistic hallucination the Patriarch had inflicted on me. Victor filled Ulric in on the situation, or at least as much of it as he knew, and I listened intently to distract myself.

  "There is good news," I said once Clara was finished. "If the Patriarch is attacking us from the inside, that means he can't get in from the outside."

  "Why would he need to? We already brought one of his minions inside," said Sebastian.

  "While your concerns are valid, Sebastian, I'm convinced that the boy is the only real chance we have of stopping the Patriarch," said Ulric. "The hunter's moon is close and we're still no closer to learning what the hybrid's connection is to any of it."

  I felt a pang of guilt but reminded myself that I wasn't keeping them from progress by not telling them. I was just keeping them from shutting me out completely. There was no way Ulric or Victor or Sebastian would let me be used to stop the hunters if they even thought there was a chance that what the Patriarch said about my being a sacrifice was true.

  "When we go to the temple tomorrow for the ceremony, I need to stay behind," I said. "Alex said he could help me talk to the moon. If the Patriarch is showing up on our doorstep, maybe it's finally time I heard her out."

  Ulric watched me hesitantly. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt, but you're not going alone. First, I'd like to get the rest of the story from Arthur when he wakes up."

  "You mean if he wakes up," Sebastian muttered. He shrugged defensively when everyone glared at him. "What? The big man in the sky himself tried him on for size, who knows when he's coming back?"

  "He's right," I admitted, casting a worried glance at Arthur. He wasn't sleeping but he wasn't fully awake, either. He was just staring at the wall in some kind of limbo. "Arthur has been through a lot. He was kept in isolation for months, tortured at the hands of the person he loves most. Maybe this really is the last straw."

  Ulric put his hand on my shoulder and gazed at me with far more kindness than I deserved. "You said it yourself, he's been through all that and he's still here. Try to have a bit of faith."

  "I can't believe I'm saying this," said Sebastian, "but don't hunters kind of bounce back stronger when they die? If we need the information he's got looked in his head so badly, we could just kill him."

  "No," Victor and I said in unison.

  "Arthur has been fighting to resist transition since he was little," I explained. "There's no way to guarantee that the creature who wakes up will be him."

  "Then he really would be a threat," said Victor.

  "Besides," said Ulric, "we don't even know how they come back."

  "Arthur said they have to find closure first," I explained. "The hunters think their weakness and humanity will follow them into the transition if they don't 'overcome' them before they die. They get brainwashed into completing a mission for the patriarch that ends with them being killed honorably. I don't know how they bring them back after that, though."

  "And I thought my transition was rough," Clara snorted.

  "You were a butterfly emerging from her cocoon," Victor said gently. "Hunters emerge as soulless monsters."

  She rolled her eyes at his comment, but I could tell his gallantry hit its mark. "So what happens if one of them doesn't get closure before he dies?"

  "I don't know," I admitted. "Arthur refused to tell Prentice what it was that he needed, that's why he tortured him. I guess the answer has to be given willingly--more or less."

  "So the sick fuck does have some moral code," said Sebastian.

  "It would seem so." Ulric sighed. "Alright everyone, move along. I told Clarence I would take his shift so he could get some sleep. He agreed to stand watch while everyone is at the ceremony tomorrow."

  "Everyone?" I asked. "I thought it was just me, you, Victor, Brendan, and Mav."

  "I'm going, too," said Clara.

  "Same here," said Sebastian. "So are Jason, Hunter, and Foster."

  I blinked in surprise. "But why? Everyone hated Steven."

  "For the same reason you are," Clara said softly. "I feel comfortable speaking for everyone when I say that we've all grown to love Maverick during his time here. We'd like to show our support."

  Tears stung my eyes and I tried to pass it off as a result of the stitches. "I'm sure that will mean a lot to him."

  "Well, I'm going to get some shut eye," said Clara. "Uncle Ulric, call me if anything changes with Arthur's condition."

  "I will," he promised. He had already turned to his place in a book I didn't recognize. It looked old.

  "Are you sure you'll be okay by yourself?" I asked worriedly once Victor and Sebastian had left.

  He gave me a look. "If you were able to headbutt him into submission, I think I'll manage."

  "Alright."

  I must have lingered in the door for a moment too long because he cleared his throat. "Is there something else?"

  "Have you seen Sarah around anywhere?"

  He frowned, considering it. "No, not recently. Any reason you ask?"

  "No, we just kind of had a thing the last time we spoke," I admitted.

  "Ah," he said knowingly, slipping on his reading glasses. "Well, do try to resolve it the next time you see her. It's a dangerous world we live in and you can't control what happens to people, but you can control how you part."

  "I'll remember that," I murmured. "Goodnight, dad."

  "Goodnight...sweetheart?" he said tentatively like it was a question.

  I laughed. "You're in luck, that nickname hasn't been taken."

  "Good. It's hardly the most original, but it'll have to do as a placeholder."

  I smiled, closing the door behind me as I went out into the common area. The living room was empty, but there were two voices coming from the bedroom. When I walked in, the twins were standing close, discussing something intently.

  I leaned on the door frame and folded my arms as I watched them. "You don't need to argue over how to tell me, you know. Just come out and say it like men."

  They stared at me in differing states of bewilderment. Sebastian looked like he had just been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "Come again?"

  "You were planning on telling me that you're both leaving me to run off together, right?" I asked in a dry tone that was clearly sailing over Sebastian's head. "It's okay. I'm a big boy, I can take it."

  "Me and Victor? Ew," Sebastian said, grimacing.

  Victor rolled his eyes. "He's being sarcastic, Seb."

  "Oh, you even have pet names for each other now? That's so cute."

  "You're hilarious," Victor droned, pushing me gently down onto the bed. "As a matter of fact, we were just arguing over who gets to spend the night with you."

  I leaned back and propped myself up on my
elbows to watch them. "Is that so?" I smirked. "So, what's the verdict?"

  "Well, it's his day," Victor admitted. "But after what happened, I don't want to leave you without psychic protection."

  "And I don't wanna leave him without actual protection," Sebastian shot back. "Seems we're at a railroad."

  I stared at Sebastian for a moment, tilting my head. When I opened my mouth to correct him on the expression, Victor shushed me with a headshake and a resigned look that said it was futile.

  "Well, if you can't come to an agreement, why not let me be the deciding vote?" I offered.

  They looked at each other and Victor warily said, "Alright. Go ahead."

  I pursed my lips and looked between them in appraisal. "Hmm. I'll have to choose…both."

  The tension in the room melted, which had been my plan all along, but I wasn't sure if it was really such a bad idea now that I had said it out loud.

  "Come on, give us a real decision," said Victor. "Who would you feel safest with?"

  "Both of you. I've been through a lot today and you both make me feel safe in different ways. I don't think I'll be able to sleep without knowing you're both close."

  "He's not kidding," said Sebastian.

  "No, he's not," Victor agreed. They were really getting the twin thing down.

  "Please?" I smiled invitingly, crawling to the middle of the bed. I settled against the headboard and patted the bed on either side of me. "I'd make a good divider."

  They looked at each other again and Sebastian was the first to shrug. "Hey, if it'll make him feel better."

  "You're not the one that has to share a bed with you," muttered Victor. I could tell he was going to give in, it was only a matter of persuading him.

  "Come on," I purred. "The bed is big enough for all of us. If you do this for me, I promise I won't ask you about That Thing it is you're hiding so well."

  Of course, that didn't mean I was going to stop asking Sebastian. He was the only one I stood a chance at cracking, anyway.

  He hesitated. "It's that important to you?"

  "It is."

  He gave a dramatic sigh. "Fine. I suppose two is better than one."

  I clapped excitedly. I really did want them with me because it felt safer for all of us, but it sounded fun now that it was actually going to happen. Truth be told, I liked it when we were all together more than when we were apart. Whenever I was with one brother, there was always part of my heart that stayed behind with the other, worrying about what he was doing or how he might be feeling. When we were all together, it was so much easier to give them both the full attention they deserved.

  And that was the moment I realized I had dogs, not boyfriends. It bothered me less than it should have. I got out of bed and went over to the suitcase I was living out of. I bent over and dug through the bag until I found my favorite nightshirt and slipped my T-shirt over my head so I could change.

  "Whoa, what are you doing?" Victor demanded. When I glanced over my shoulder, he had a possessive look on his face. Meanwhile, Sebastian was just enjoying the show.

  I blinked innocently at him. "I'm getting ready for bed."

  "You know what I mean."

  "What, am I supposed to go all the way upstairs to change?" I asked. "Sebastian has already seen everything there is to see and it's only a matter of time before you do, as long as you're not planning on pulling anymore disappearing acts."

  Sebastian made a scoffing sound and Victor silenced him with a glare.

  "Alright, you have a point," he grumbled, turning away. When Sebastian didn't follow suit, he hit him hard on the arm.

  "What? He's right, I already know what's under those tight little blue shorts." Sebastian gave me a dopey grin. "Kind of hard to forget."

  I smiled back at him and crawled in between them, draping my arms around their shoulders. "See? This isn't so bad, is it?"

  Victor rolled his eyes and stood to slip out of his shoes and belt. Sebastian had already stripped down to his boxers, shameless as always. "Let's just get some sleep so I can relieve your dad of duty in the morning."

  "Sounds good," I said, crawling underneath the covers. Sebastian joined me on one side and Victor reluctantly slipped in on the other. Two wolves in the same bed were better than any electric blanket, so I snuggled in contentedly.

  "Night, kiddo," Sebastian said, leaning over to give me a chaste peck on the cheek.

  "Night," I said happily.

  Victor turned towards me and hesitated. I saved him the guesswork by leaning in to kiss the corner of his mouth. "Night, Vic."

  "Goodnight," he murmured before rolling over again.

  I sighed, wondering why he always had to be so distant. When it came to everything and everyone else, he just took what he wanted. He was everything I needed inside his dungeon walls, but once we were in the real world he seemed at a loss for what to do with me. With Sebastian, it was the exact opposite problem.

  I yawned, too tired to give it much more thought for the night. The next day was going to be full of enough drama of its own. I fell asleep on my back with both of them facing away from me. When I woke in the middle of the night, they were both gone.

  Sitting up to look around, I found the room empty. Something wasn't right. They wouldn't have left me alone unless something was seriously wrong. I rose from the bed and crept out of the room into the common area. When I turned the corner passed the second cell, I saw them.

  They both had their backs to me and they were blocking the door to Arthur's room, which was aglow with an unnatural white light. My steps quickened as I strained to see past them. When I finally managed to get past them, Victor's hand shot out and grabbed my arm with mechanical precision.

  "Don't go in there. You won't like what you find."

  I wrenched out of his grasp and rushed forward. The distance between them and the room seemed to stretch endlessly.

  "He should have listened," said Sebastian.

  "He never does."

  When I made it into to the room, I could barely see through bright the light. It hung thick in the air like fog. Arthur's bed was empty. I turned around, hoping he was still in the room somewhere. Instead, I found Ulric facing the corner, his head resting against the wall. It was only when I reached for his shoulder that I noticed the thin trickle of blood running down the wall.

  "No," I gasped, turning him around. "Dad?"

  His body was stiff and his eyes were blank as he stared down at me. In the center of his forehead was a small round wound with a trail of blood dripping straight down between his eyes.

  I took a step back and stumbled. "Dad, no," I breathed.

  His body lurched forward like a mannequin thrown off balance. His dead eyes followed me. "Your hands," he said, his stiff arm jutting out to point at me. "The blood is on your hands."

  I looked down to find both marks on the backs of my hands not only visible but seeping blood. "No," I said, shaking my head. "Help me," I cried, turning to my protectors.

  They were still at the door, but their stiff bodies and blank expressions remained unchanged. In unison, they mirrored Ulric's accusatory pointing and monotone voice as they said, "The blood is on his hands."

  As the marks were washed clean with blood, the twins flickered in and out of existence. "No," I cried, running towards them. "No, please don't leave me!"

  When I grasped for them, they disappeared completely. I turned around only to find that the hospital bed was now a stone altar and the cell block had become a forest I didn't recognize. I stared at the empty altar and tried to discern its purpose, but a sound behind me drew my attention.

  It was Alex. He was walking towards me and behind him was a row of altars just like the one I had stumbled upon. "It could have been so simple," he said, stepping closer. "A single sacrifice. Instead, it had to be them."

  "What are you talking about?" I asked, my voice catching in my throat. "It had to be who?"

  He turned his head and pointed towards the stone altars with the
same stiff gesticulation as the others. It was only then that I noticed the fact that the hair on the back of his head was matted with blood.

  I followed his gaze to the altars and my heart seized with grief as I realized that they weren't empty. Everyone I had ever dared to love since moving to Washington, from Victor and Remus to Ulric and Sarah, was laid atop his or her own altar. Even Val and Billy were beside each other, their eyes closed and their faces ashen.

  "Look at what you did to them," said Alex, suddenly beside me.

  "I-I didn't," I stammered, falling to my knees. "I couldn't have."

  "Look at what you made her do," he hissed.

  "Who?" I cried in range, digging my nails into the earth. I felt my bones cracking from the force as the beast within rumbled in my chest.

  Alex ceased pointing and looked straight up. The full moon hung directly over our heads like a looming specter, but her glow was no longer warm and soft. It was the color of blood and when I looked up, a droplet of something hit my cheek. I touched the sticky substance and realized with disgust that it smelled like a grotesque concoction of the blood of everyone I loved.

  The blood of all the people I had killed.

  In perfect synchronization, the bodies on the altars rose up and all pointed at me. "The blood is on his hands," they chanted in unison. I scrambled to my feet and collided with Alex in my attempt to escape, only to find that he had joined in with them.

  "No," I screamed, taking off into the forest as I felt my bones crunching with each step. The beast within was writhing to escape, undoubtedly so it could join in their condemnation. "Not my hands," I screamed. "My hands are clean!"

  Chapter 10

  REMUS

  "No," I cried, thrashing to escape the groping, stiff grey hands that had once belonged to my loved ones. "They're clean, I swear, my hands are clean!"

  "Remus, stop! It's me!" Sebastian's voice broke through that awful chant and his arms wrapped around me, strong and warm, pulling me from the sea of grasping hands.